Sunday Prayer
Come and sit beside me for a moment, Nameless One. I feel lonely and I wish to be near to You.
First, the "thank you"s. Thank you for life, for another day, and for the birds chirping yet again their praises to You in the trees. Thank you for an evening with my daughters, for hammocks, and for ice cream. Thank you for the majesty of the lake that sometimes frightens me with its depths, echoing of the numinous awe your holy presence brings to my consciousness. The starting place of all faith: the awe and fear and reverence of You. Forgive me for the many times I because haughty, stiff-necked, proud, and dismissive of You and of life.
The old cartoon of the angel and the demon on each shoulder does depict a reality: we all have good and evil within ourselves, and we all can make the choice each day -- even each moment -- to heed the gentle, inviting whisper of the Good or to fall, as we are so very prone to do, into an abyss of despair. We give the doubts to You, Almighty, for they are great but You are so much greater. We feel and believe ourselves to be utterly mired in sin, so trapped within it as to be utterly incapable of extricating ourselves from its grasp.
Like the insect caught in the spider's web, we can writhe and convulse with all of our power and strength, but we might as well just stop trying and surrender.
"Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." What a profound prayer! I would rather my will be done, frankly. I do not wish to deny myself anything that I desire. When I'm horny, give me some pornography. When I'm hungry, give me a cheeseburger. When I'm sad, give me drugs to make me feel happy. When I'm stressed, give me a shot or two of whiskey to "take the edge off." When I'm bored, give me endless screens and entertainment so that I can forget myself (and You!) in a fog of Nothingness.
I hope you won't mind if I call you by the names I learned from my home language of Christianity. I know that it is not the only language -- nor perhaps even the best one -- yet it is my native tongue. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, triune God who entered humanity's reality and sin and who now dwells with us and in us who believe in You, take my heart and my mind and my strength and my soul into Your loving hands. Walk with me this day and teach me to lend my darkness to you, allowing it to dissipate in the light of your love. Awaken within me and ability to see others as You see them; let me find within each face a reminder of the goodness of all of creation, and of the Goodness at the heart of it all.
Amen.
First, the "thank you"s. Thank you for life, for another day, and for the birds chirping yet again their praises to You in the trees. Thank you for an evening with my daughters, for hammocks, and for ice cream. Thank you for the majesty of the lake that sometimes frightens me with its depths, echoing of the numinous awe your holy presence brings to my consciousness. The starting place of all faith: the awe and fear and reverence of You. Forgive me for the many times I because haughty, stiff-necked, proud, and dismissive of You and of life.
The old cartoon of the angel and the demon on each shoulder does depict a reality: we all have good and evil within ourselves, and we all can make the choice each day -- even each moment -- to heed the gentle, inviting whisper of the Good or to fall, as we are so very prone to do, into an abyss of despair. We give the doubts to You, Almighty, for they are great but You are so much greater. We feel and believe ourselves to be utterly mired in sin, so trapped within it as to be utterly incapable of extricating ourselves from its grasp.
Like the insect caught in the spider's web, we can writhe and convulse with all of our power and strength, but we might as well just stop trying and surrender.
"Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." What a profound prayer! I would rather my will be done, frankly. I do not wish to deny myself anything that I desire. When I'm horny, give me some pornography. When I'm hungry, give me a cheeseburger. When I'm sad, give me drugs to make me feel happy. When I'm stressed, give me a shot or two of whiskey to "take the edge off." When I'm bored, give me endless screens and entertainment so that I can forget myself (and You!) in a fog of Nothingness.
I hope you won't mind if I call you by the names I learned from my home language of Christianity. I know that it is not the only language -- nor perhaps even the best one -- yet it is my native tongue. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, triune God who entered humanity's reality and sin and who now dwells with us and in us who believe in You, take my heart and my mind and my strength and my soul into Your loving hands. Walk with me this day and teach me to lend my darkness to you, allowing it to dissipate in the light of your love. Awaken within me and ability to see others as You see them; let me find within each face a reminder of the goodness of all of creation, and of the Goodness at the heart of it all.
Amen.
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